


Happy F'n Holiday

by Kiwi25



Category: Star Trek (2009), True Blood
Genre: Anal Sex, F/M, Group Sex, Het, M/M, Oral Sex, Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-01-17
Updated: 2011-01-17
Packaged: 2017-10-14 20:47:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,783
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/153309
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kiwi25/pseuds/Kiwi25
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Leonard McCoy's Christmas Eve discovery leads to the best Christmas present ever for Nyota Uhura and maybe the good doctor.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Written for Writers' Anonymous Holiday gift exchange.

**  
_Happy Fucking Holiday - A Leonard McCoy/Nyota Uhura/Eric Northman Tryst_   
**

“Doctor,” Leonard McCoy met the blue eyes of his head nurse Christine Chapel, “The final container has been delivered from the planet’s surface.”

 

 

He nodded removing the frames from his face before pushing away from his desk. He tossed a wayward glance to the overwhelming piles of PADDs and stacks of antiquated journals that littered his work area. He nearly tripped on a stray strand of tinsel when he emerged from his office.

 

 

“Bunch of coc…” His grumble was interrupted by his on duty conscience.

 

 

“Don’t you dare finish that statement Leonard McCoy or I promise you’ll regret it.”

 

 

McCoy didn’t even look in the direction of the airy voice. He knew her finger was pointed, her face red, and lips tight and thin. Biggest hypocrite on the ship, pretending be all genteel and proper, he’d heard enough shore leave stories gone wrong about that one.  So he chose to disregard the nurse and her superficial rebuke.

 

 

Hell he ignored Christine Chapel daily, except when her valued wisdom was needed and unfortunately today proved to be one of those instances. Gaila was out of reach, on holiday with her latest fling, Jim’s answer to everything was sex, and so was Gaila’s for that matter, and Spock, no one was going to ask the hobgoblin a darn thing. He swallowed what was left of his pride, tossed a wayward glance around his empty sickbay and prepared to yield to Chapel’s expertise.

 

 

Thankfully there were no witnesses.

 

 

Sickbay was operating on a skeleton crew as the ship hovered above Earth’s atmosphere. Many of the officers were down below visiting with family and friends. He swallowed Scrooge’s favorite musing, _bah humbug_ that rattled around the back of his throat.

 

 

There was much he had to be thankful for, a beautiful girlfriend, a healthy, money spending daughter who was contemplating what college to attend, and a host of friends that either encouraged his desire to commit genocide or homicide. So what he couldn’t think of the perfect gift for Nyota Uhura. Surely her friend and blabber mouth confidant would have a few ideas.

 

 

“What did my favorite doctor get my best friend for Christmas?”

 

 

Heavens, did the woman shut up long enough for someone else to get a word in? He nearly growled and bit Chapel’s head off, but he was trying to embrace, the kinder, gentler side, that Nyota seemed to love.

 

 

“Oh that looks like the face of someone who has yet…”

 

 

“Can it nurse and mind your own dang blasted business.”

 

 

With less than twenty – four hours left before the actual Christmas holiday, McCoy had to pull off the best gift ever, alone. He was _fucked_.

 

 

McCoy snatched his tri - corder and remaining tools before heading to the medical containment area.

 

 

~

 

 

There were no markings on the sarcophagus to immediately identify ownership or what it contained. He knew little about family seals and symbolic meanings that was closer to Nyota’s specialty. His fingers traced the lines and indentations, knotted coils, gold embossed heads that he couldn’t distinguish as reptile, bird, or mammal. It was ancient. There were no Starfleet issued ids, nothing to reflect the new world order.

 

 

The doctor continued his investigation; running his instruments over the surface, seeking any potential signs of life and recording his findings. He stepped back and studied the black opalescence of the glorified coffin. He checked the underside for a way inside.

 

 

 _Nothing!_

 

 

 

He allowed his fingers to glide over the interchanging symbols in different orders and finally he heard a squeal and whine when the covering slid inside of the encasement and revealed a black silk sheet.

 

 

McCoy could see the impression of a nose and lips against the material, “What the hell?” His hands shook as he leaned in closer, “This is a…”

 

 

He peeled back the covering, “Well I’ll be damned.”

 

 

The pale skin and blonde hair was immediately recognizable. The books had been forced reading by his lady love, the holovids mandatory viewing whenever she felt under the weather. As far as he’d known, Eric Northman was a fictional character that never existed.

 

 

He hit his communicator, hesitating, and deciding against calling his nurse for assistance. Instead he crept back to medical storage, retrieved a few vials of synthetic blood and returned to his discovery.

 

 

The perfect Christmas gift was beamed right into his lap.

 

 

Once the second injection was made, color returned to the specimen’s cheeks, and his eyelids began to flutter. Halfway through the third, he felt a cold steel grasp on his wrist that threatened to turn his bones to dust.

 

 

“I’m Dr. Leonard McCoy and you’re aboard the USS Enterprise,” His next words came out in a strangled gasp, “Please let go.”

 

 

The dead man leapt from his resting place, still gripping the doctor’s arm. He sniffed him, before his eyes surveyed McCoy from head to foot.

 

 

“Fascinating.”

 

 

He’d expected more Dracula, Bela Lugosi, and what he got was an intoxicating tenor that created a foreign reaction in his body.

 

 

“Leonard, I am indebted to you for your timely care and rescue, if you would, please excuse me while I return to those who are most important to me.”

 

 

He released his hold on McCoy and sauntered to the door, confused and befuddled searching for a knob or handle.

 

 

“Mr. Northman, I’m afraid a lot has changed,” He rummaged the dusty corners of his mind for the term used in the books, “to ground…since you went to ground.”

 

 

The man reminded him of Spock when one eyebrow carefully lifted in an unspoken question.

 

 

“Am I not in Shreveport?”

 

 

McCoy’s laughter ripped through air, “You’re a hell of a long way from Louisiana.”

 

 

In the next five minutes, McCoy carried the vampire through two hundred and fifty years worth of history.

 

 

“Merry fucking Christmas,” he delivered as he clapped his hand down on the near giant’s shoulder.

 

 

 **~**

 

 

 _Dumbass…_

 

 

 

That’s what McCoy was; too much time with Jim caused him to revert to his friend’s ways. Why had he thought it was a good idea to bring this Northman bastard back to his quarters? Why did he think it was okay to introduce him to Nyota and watch as the man immediately went to work on the best thing in his life?

 

 

Fancy French words that she understood and blushed in response to, lazy Louisiana brogue that made her lashes lower and that low purr of a laugh usually reserved for him leave her lips.

 

 

He stepped forward, attempting to break their connection, and he was greeted by the heady scent of her arousal. Hell, he had to work for at least fifteen minutes to get her to that point, bring in some six four marbled ab Adonis and her panties are wet in thirty seconds.

 

 

“Leonard.” Dammit he hated the way his dick twitched when that arrogant ass said his name. “You have a lovely mate.”

 

 

A bottle of Macallan 25 later, everything seemed like a genius idea; three naked bodies and the sounds of Nyota’s moans caressing his ears. They’d shared fantasies, discussed the possibilities of a ménage a trois and his desire to have his body explored in ways that no woman had before.

 

 

Now as he spread her legs wider and prepared to taste her again, cool fingertips ghosted across the curve of his spine and he hardened immediately. His lips found her clit and a smooth palm stroked the length of his member.

 

 

“Shit.”

 

 

“Do you not want me to touch you Leonard?”

 

 

He knew his body betrayed him, when their guest’s strokes became stronger and more urgent.

 

 

“Take her.”

 

 

Eric urged and McCoy did so without a second thought. He changed position, sinking into her silken heat. He didn’t move, pausing to savor the moment, the feel of her skin against his, her teeth that grazed his ear, and the seductive whispers that promised the night had only just begun.

 

 

He nearly exploded inside of her halfway through the first stroke, when he felt the vampire’s tongue taste them where they were joined.

 

 

Nyota whispered, “Let go.”

 

 

And he did, forgetting about his long held misgivings about sex with another man.

 

 

McCoy slipped out of the comfort of Nyota completely. He shivered when he felt Eric’s lips and tongue cover the head of his dick, cleaning him of every drop of her nectar. He kissed the woman beneath him to muffle the near scream forcing its way out of his mouth.

 

 

Lips tongue and fangs nearly caused him to lose the threads of his sanity. A hand directed his member back to Nyota’s warmth and he willingly followed the guide.

 

 

The process repeated and it became pure torture and the pressure built and with one tiny nip on the tip of his junk, everything he held back filled the mouth of their ghost from Christmas past.

 

 

Immediately he felt bad about foregoing Nyota’s pleasure for his own and then he heard her escalating moans and realized that the sight of his blow job had been enough to encourage her fingers to part her folds and tease her to the point of an explosive orgasm.

 

 

The doctor didn’t complain when her legs wrapped around Eric’s waist. In fact he watched, contently over the other man’s shoulder, palming his hard on in a promise to take measures into his own hands.

 

 

“Leonard.” His body did it again, “Join us.”

 

 

He didn’t know where to start until Eric’s hand pulled him closer, forcing his body to mold to his back.

 

 

“Use your imagination doctor…she’s so wet.”

 

 

The vampire removed his impressive length from Nyota long enough for McCoy to play in the signs of her building excitement. His fingers moved lower lubricating her smaller hole as Eric aided in his cause by lifting her hip’s higher and increasing the space for them to fully please the lovely linguist.

 

 

Eric returned to his prize and McCoy gently toyed with the opening of her lower valley, easing in slowly opposite to the strokes and rhythm created by the other man. Back and forth they continued until her body shook in sheer ecstasy. They came in tandem, Nyota beginning the chain, followed by McCoy, and finally with a historic ending by Eric.

 

 

The three collapsed on the bed.

 

 

Two bodies sweaty and exhausted, one still showing evidence of arousal and need.

 

 

“So this is what you humans call Christmas?”

 

 

Nyota curled into McCoy’s chest and whispered, “Amazing.” He smiled appreciatively, thankful he had gotten something right until he felt her breath across his chest, “Next year check with Christine not Gaila on the gift ideas.” She kissed him sweetly before drifting to sleep.


	2. Boys Will Be Boys - Part Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Boys will be boys while Nyota gets her beauty sleep.

_**Boys Will Be Boys** _

**__**

McCoy’s thoughts became less about how to get rid of their surprise visitor and more about how to mask his body’s reaction to his presence. Minutes before he’d mewled like a kitten as icy lips tasted him while he pleased his girlfriend. He shut his eyes tighter, banishing the sight of a disapproving Nyota with slanted eyes and thin lips. He wasn’t Jim Kirk he couldn’t test the boundaries of accepted sexuality. He grumbled, rising from the bed, taking his hard dick, and barely sated body into the lav.

 

 

“23rd fuckin’ century and I’m worried…”

 

 

Icy fingertips traveling along the grooves of his spine interrupted his thoughts.

 

 

His stomach flipped when he felt the lips he’d fantasized about caress his ear, “Come back to bed Leonard, there is still so much I want to show you.”

 

 

Common sense told him to move from his grasp, instead he relished the cool marble pressed against his back, and he allowed his head to fall back rest of the strength of the man’s chest, while the vampire’s fingers drifted lower and curved around the length of his throbbing member. He groaned and arched into the sexual aggressor, fully aware of the man’s own excitement as it rubbed the cheeks of his ass.

 

 

Before he could protest, the doctor found he was face to chest with Eric.  He debated the consequences of stretching his neck and tasting the man’s lips. The choice was quickly made when the vampire bit and nipped at his bottom lip. Their kiss was urgent and hungry. Much different than the innocent and playful exchanges he shared with Nyota; not better – just different.

 

 

“I can taste your desire.”

 

 

Either he was transparent or incapable of withstanding the vampire’s mind – reading parlor tricks.

 

 

McCoy allowed his fingers to dig into Eric’s pale flesh. He clawed and scratched when he felt the fangs pull the tender flesh of his lips into his new obsession’s mouth. He needed to closer.

 

 

They were both unbearably erect, but even as he felt the stainless steel sink pressing against the small of his back, he refused to be the piss-ant lips and ass used only for their guest’s pleasure.

 

 

“I would not dream of denying you doctor.”

 

 

He hissed when the man’s attention moved from his lips to his ears to his neck, and finally stopped at his nipples. It was a point of weakness and he wasn’t bothered by the foreign grunts and curses that swirled around them as Eric feasted on the rivulets of blood stemming from his love bites.  

 

 

Now McCoy understood his lady love very well. His legs were draped over massive shoulders and it wasn’t enough, he couldn’t get enough of the man’s mouth on the cock that needed to be sucked. He lifted his hips and pumped harder. He grunted and breathed heavily, forgetting about the sleeping form of the woman he adored, or any bystanders in the hallway. He threaded the fingers of one hand into the perfectly cropped blonde crown as he struggled to see exactly what was being done to his body. Slow tortuous strokes, covered his length, coating him, and forcing him deeper down the man's throat. Swirls around the head of his dick gave way to the first drop of eruption to soon to come before he found himself sheathed in comforting coolness and grazed by the teeth that easily change his name from Leonard to Leona.

 

 

A growl gave way to a delicious drawl, “Fuck,” And he came with a shout.

 

 

He was still panting when the man lowered his feet to floor. Enchanted by the swollen lips he’d just abused with every inch of his unsatisfied dick.

Recharged and feeding on the lust in the space, McCoy leveled a command he couldn't wait to enjoy.

"Bend over."

He felt the blood rush to the point of necessity with the chilling smirk the vampire leveled in his direction.

"I'm going to fuck you good and proper."

One hand rested on the flesh of his victim's hip while the other reached for an inconspicuous tube on the shelf amongst all of Nyota's products. He was sure additional lubrication was unnecessary but it would prove to be fun. The doctor coated his fingers before allowing his middle digit to slip between the Viking's crack. He teased and tickled, remembering all the things he liked when he allowed for this game to be played. He cupped the man's balls as he eased his finger in deeper. Still there was response from his subject. So he wiggled and teased, stretching him further to all the entry of another digit. Finally a low groan was emitted and he began to rock back into his hand.

Cupping, gave way to palming, until the doctor found himself employing the use of long strokes as a third finger rested in the vampire's backside.

"You ready, darlin' ?"

It was an outrageous question especially for someone who had feasted on stronger more vicious men than him.

A forceful thrust backwards on his hand answered the inquiry.

McCoy poised the tip at Eric's entrance, unprepared the intensity of what he would feel as he pushed deeper. There was no comparison, again it was different, but indescribable. He pumped another inche filled the man. His breath hitched and he wouldn't be able to keep up the pace.

Eric joined into his rhythm, taunting him with words about premature ejaculation and unachieved pleasure. McCoy slipped from his tightness, before plunging, deeper and harder into the man. Over and over again until he felt the pressure build. He couldn't decipher the curses emitted from the Viking's lips, but he understood satisfaction when the sink ripped from the wall forcing them to the floor.

McCoy's assault continued and he was sure that it was wanted by the way Eric's lifted his ass higher begging for deeper penetration. One more thrust and he was there - curiosity killed and desires fulfilled.


End file.
